baldie Posted October 31, 2007 Report Share Posted October 31, 2007 Ever had one of them walks with your dog, when you see some odd things? I went off my usual route for a change, and did a 4 mile trek round a couple of local villages adjacent to the m1. First thing i saw, was a bird flashing her tits out of a car window wish she would have come back [someone else was driving], then as i was dropping down towards the motorway bridge, i spotted a buzzard, then its mate appeared, and they started circling, just like bombay shitehawks.I thought this was great, as i didn,t know we had them locally. Then a cop car pulled up along side me, eyeing me up and down The wife says she thinks i look like a pikey, because of the shaggy lurcher [deerhound x greyhound] so she explained, so did the police probarbly........cheeky bitch. Anyway, they dropped down the hill and up the other side, where a car was parked up, on the bridge, and another cop car too.As i neared, i though some daft bugger had jumped, but the two bobbies were attempting to hide in the hawthorne hedge, which was laughable, as they were wearing dayglo yellow coats they stood out like a pair of pike floats As i neared, i was having the craic with them, then i spotted a wire going over the road to what looked like a giant grabbit arm. I said, "is that a"...."its a stinger " said the bobby oh, sez i, youll be expecting someone then? Yep, he said with a big grin, so i "moved along".........all of 20 yards they werent too bothered.I,m a nosey git. Sure enough, not a minute later, there was sirens going, and up flew an audi with one of our foreign cousins driving, and several youths in with him, another cop car sent him over the bridge, and although i couldn,t see the stinger deployed, i hears the tires go, and he had to stop half a mile back up the hill, to a full sweeney type "nick" Our village is normally that quiet, you can hear the cabbages growing, i had to lie down Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest varmartin Posted November 1, 2007 Report Share Posted November 1, 2007 Wow.... a bit of excitement on what could have been a dull day. I was driving down the M5 once in my van, when a car past me slowly, in it was a young lady gobbing something out the window and next to here was a chap fumbling with his jeans...... I knew which category she fell into Martin Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest ds2 Posted November 1, 2007 Report Share Posted November 1, 2007 nice one baldie you made me laugh this morning mate, you can hear the cabbages growing i will have to remember that one cheers ds2. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scotch_egg Posted November 1, 2007 Report Share Posted November 1, 2007 baldie what type of audi was it? just out of interest....... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest 308Panther Posted November 1, 2007 Report Share Posted November 1, 2007 Great story Baldie... Not everyday ya got some chick flashin ya her tits at ya..... I havent seen anything like that since I quit workin the Bike Rallies and swap meets.... 308Panther Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Redfox Posted November 1, 2007 Report Share Posted November 1, 2007 You want to try drift fly fishing on the lakes as you quietly float past you see all sorts of things including two young ladies flashing a good deal more than tits and completely unaware of us gob smacked into silence by the show Redfox Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest 308Panther Posted November 1, 2007 Report Share Posted November 1, 2007 You want to try drift fly fishing on the lakes as you quietly float past you see all sorts of things including two young ladies flashing a good deal more than tits and completely unaware of us gob smacked into silence by the show Redfox Didjya try tickling them with some pheasant hackle? 308Panther Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Redfox Posted November 2, 2007 Report Share Posted November 2, 2007 No we might have been offered a "Hairy Mary" back Redfox Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest 308Panther Posted November 2, 2007 Report Share Posted November 2, 2007 No we might have been offered a "Hairy Mary" back Redfox I am afraid to ask. It might be safer that I dont know. 308Panther Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ds1 Posted November 3, 2007 Report Share Posted November 3, 2007 When I first bought my shooting range I had to cut the grass - it looked like a meadow, a good challenge for a petrol mower I thought. So up I trunddle one day petrol mover and all. On my way up the dirt lane I noticed a BMW parked, thankfully not right in the middle of the track. People on a walk or mushroom picking (popular pastime here) I thinks. The meadow grass is about waste height, so out with the mover, in with the the petrol and start her up. About 30 seconds into cutting, this couple stand up bollock naked and make a dash to behind the shed where apparently they had their clothes - I`m observant like that. Past me they had to go, being a BMW type of person she had her nose up in the air, there goes mutton undressed as mutton I thought to myself. He had something else stuck up in the air. A case of chorus-interuptus I thought to myself. As they departed without a word I just pointed to the sign that said "CCTV", - well at least I have a sign, dont have a camera but they dont know that. Not seen that BMW parked in the lane since. David. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Redfox Posted November 3, 2007 Report Share Posted November 3, 2007 Many years ago when I was young and daring ( didnt say handsome ) I used to go to a nearby sand quarry ( disused) to practise my skills with a 500cc AJS scrambles bike ( we are talking1962 or so here). On one occasion I got it off the trailer and started it up, set off immediately flat out across the quarry bottom and up the far side of the quarry, about 50 ft high and steep so as you came offthe top you were about 10-15ft in the air and would land on the slope on the other side of the bank, this was all grassy and secluded. As I was in the air I looked down to see two pairs of legs, a white backside and a lads face with eyes the size of saucers! . By the time I had gone round the back and came up the bank again there was no sign of him and his bird just a flat patch in the grass. I often wonder if he made a mistake in his terrified state and upped the population a bit!! never saw them again thats for sure. My brother was jealous he hadnt gone first . Redfox Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
foxshot Posted November 4, 2007 Report Share Posted November 4, 2007 Sounds like a entertaining walk baldie dont see many things like that around here although there are quite a few tit's in the local area Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest varmartin Posted September 21, 2009 Report Share Posted September 21, 2009 Come on ...some more stories please ....its bin a while !! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
1967spud Posted September 21, 2009 Report Share Posted September 21, 2009 thats scary martin i was reading this exact post 2 mins a go, Well where i live i have a wood oppisite my house which i look after, one day i was going round the wood to feed on my quad and in the middle of the wood stood a bloke in a bra and skirt holding a pair of ladies shoes. To be honest i dont know who was the more frightened me or him, well untill i chased him out of the wood. True story as well...... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest varmartin Posted September 21, 2009 Report Share Posted September 21, 2009 Well of cause he was holding them ...the ground was to soft to walk in them ......sheeesh.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
1967spud Posted September 22, 2009 Report Share Posted September 22, 2009 Well of cause he was holding them ...the ground was to soft to walk in them ......sheeesh.... never thought of that martin , there is nothing worse than that which promotes growth and vigour all over your best Jimy Choo's Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hughes.s Posted September 23, 2009 Report Share Posted September 23, 2009 Years ago when I got my first shotgun I was keen as mustard in vermin controlling, one Sunday afternoon I was watching over a dead rabbit I had put out for the rooks/crows. I was standing under a hawthorn tree with the ground sloping away behind me, the slope was all hawthorn/bramble with a few sheep tracks in it, I had two shells in the chambers and the action "broken" so as I leaned against the tree the gun was coverd. I heard a noise behind me thought it was a sheep, turned my head round and there was a bloke naked except for a pair of shoes, I"ve got something to show you" he said,"I"ve got something to show you" said I, turned fully round and closed the gun with a luverly clunk. At this he gave a scream and ran THROUGH the hawthorns giving it "ouch ooh ouch no ouch" etc, I unloaded and followed him at a safer pace along the sheep tracks. Never did see him again but found a pile of discarded clothes that some one had "dumped" so I cleared them up with four doses of number sixes. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chris-NZ Posted September 24, 2009 Report Share Posted September 24, 2009 Sounds like a case of "You show me your gun, I'll show you mine" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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